I am trying to remember that the world is not a place consumed with the emotions I am feeling at this moment. There is life, light, and joy, mostly in my back yard. 
The last few days we have been watching baby birds in a nest right outside the window of our bathroom. Every day I have been taking pictures, I did not get pictures of their eggs – bummer. I did get them when they were all ugly, scraggly looking little robin chicklets. They were cutely beautiful. On Sunday, one of them left the nest. It somehow got to the fence and sat there for a while. I did not see when the second one took off, but the third one sat in the nest squawking what sounded like “Hey, hey, hey! Where did you all go?”
I had been going out and talking to mother for days.
She did not like it much and would pretend as if she were a statue. It was rather funny. The last one left the nest yesterday. All of the birds in the yard were chirping away, it seemed that every type that is living in our trees was watching the young birds. They all seemed to be rooting for them. I went into the back at one point yesterday to see if I could find the three little ones and a ton of birds started chirping and flying away. I saw the three little ones try to fly as fast as they could as they swooped up into the nearby tree.
The little one with its distinct voice, “Hey, hey, hey!”
The poor thing does not seem to have a pretty chirp. Hee hee On Sunday, I took each child for a walk to explore our yard. I spent alone time with each of them. I enjoyed very much how each of them explored and pointed out different things. We discussed how nature works, and about the little birds. We were hoping that all of them would be all right and make it into their bird world. Nature is a hard place to survive, you know. We had such a wonderful time, exploring, talking, trying to climb a tree that has steps to nowhere, swinging, discovering a fall leaf already, and watching the critters, so much delight back there.
It made me think of the truth about nature.
There is life and death, there is harsh and ugly, there is pure lovely goodness, and there is beauty beyond description. There are silly squirrels that use this yard as a playground, and there are amazing birds like goldfinches, and mommy robins protecting her babies. The spiders creep, and eat, the lightening bugs are unable to glow because of the heat, the butterflies flitter about the ivy, the moths come up and drink the water from the hose, and it is a magical and mysterious world. I am so happy that the kids and I get to enjoy it.
I will set my mind on these things.
It does not mean I do not care, or I am detached from the world. I am too attached – I hurt too much, I get angry at wrongful judgments, and blanketed comments. I just do not know how to cope with emotional turmoil that affects me from so many facets – it causes me too much pain. I get consumed with thoughts, too many thoughts and cannot function. I have to remember that there is both good and bad simultaneously living in us all. This is human nature.
Leaving you with a bit of our happiness – maybe someone really needs that right now.
