Last night, when all was settled and I was sitting with the kids before brushing teeth time, all the sudden I was alone in the living room. A few minutes later Ariel came back with one of the Barbies. It was from an angel collection called Timeless Sentiments® Collection. I have several angelic Barbies. She put it on the counter right next to where I was and said, “Sometimes you look like this to me.”
I laughed and asked, “You think I look like an angel or the Barbie?”
She said, “I think you look like this Barbie sometimes, with gold wings and a gold crown like hers.” I was rather shocked and unsure what that meant, but she was being serious and I did not want to ruin it. Our conversation went on.
Me: She is the Angel of Joy, did you know that?
Ariel: Yes, I read that and thought of you.
Me: You think I show joy?
Ariel: Yes, she was the one that I think you look like. Sometimes I see your hair shine, and instead of a light colored rose you have a very red rose. A very dark red rose.
Me: Wow, thank you Ariel that is very sweet.
She climbed up in my lap and we cuddled while the boys hung out with David in his room.
(Remember she is not a cuddler.) I had no idea what made her think of that, or why she said it. My mind doesn’t just except things like that so it went into a puzzle finding process. I came to the conclusion that she must have heard me on the phone with my aunt feeling sad, explaining the Barbie meltdown. I did not let the kids see me so upset, I hid it very well and wrote a poem trying to get my intense emotions out from everything I have been feeling the last few days. I had hoped she did not hear me – those types of things can be confusing to a kid if overheard and not explained.
Today while we were outside I decided to ask her if she heard me.
She said, “No, why what were you talking about?” I told her that I was a little sad about the Barbies and I wished that she could see them. She said she was a bit sad too because she would like to see them. However, she had not seen me cry, or heard me on the phone. Her inspiration for sharing that with me was all her “feeling” it in the moment. Possibly her empathy felt me, and that was her way of cheering me up. Who knows. What I do know is that my little girl has the sweetest heart. I love the way she sees the world and how she sees people.
I never want that to be disturbed – EVER!
As much as I do not think I look like Barbie and do not really want to, I have no qualms with my little girl seeing me as a joyful Angel. That makes me smile some pretty big smiles.