Daily Archives: December 21, 2010

Ariel’s Life Planned Out

Ariel has informed me on many occasions what she is going to do with her life when she is older. First there was the plan that she was moving in with Grammy when she got older and they would paint and do art all the time. She had planned on helping Grammy clean the house, do the dishes and take care of the dog, Fitzy. Well after I shared with her the truth of what it is like to live with Grammy and after Grammy shared with her the truth of what it is like to live with Grammy, she changed her plans a bit.

I was not being mean about life with Grammy, I was being honest.

When I shared with Grammy what I had shared with Ariel, she quickly agreed and told Ariel that I was correct in my description of life with Grammy. It looks fun until you live there! My Mother has very detailed and specific schedules and routines in her life, she is willing to change them around but it takes about three months for her to adjust and during those three months it is better for everyone to have limited amount of time with her. She is not mean or anything, she just needs to adjust and is in a constant overloaded state until she gets her new routine. I have my own things like that but with having three kids and the autism spectrum going on around here, there has to be more flexibility. That has taken some time to adjust to but all of us do pretty well, most days. :-)

Back to Ariel’s game plan.

Recently she has informed me, it is going on about two or three months I think, that her life is going to go like this:

“I am going to become a veterinarian because I love animals so much and I want to help them and take care of them. Then I am going to buy a car. Then I am going to buy a house. Then I will get a husband and maybe have a family. I will have animals.” Updated today: She has added that she is “going to have three children and a lot of cats”.

This quote is pretty much exactly the same every time she decides that she wants to discuss what her future holds. She seems to be concerned with Joshua and Daniel’s future as well and tries to probe them for what they are going to do with their lives. As for Joshua his plans are: “I am going to stay with Mommy and Daddy forever in this house. I like them.” When asked about getting married or having kids he says ‘No, I don’t want to.” or “No, thanks”. When Daniel is asked, the questions have to be a bit more specific but Ariel has no problem coming up with the specific questions that Daniel needs, to be able to answer them.

The conversations are like this:

Ariel: So Daniel, are you going to build things when you grow up?

Daniel: Yeah.

Ariel: What kind of things, fans?

Daniel: Yeah.

Ariel: Are you going to use batteries.

Daniel: Yeah.

Ariel: Oh, wow you are going to make cool fans and batteries. That is awesome Daniel.

Daniel: Yeah. Fans. Batteries.

It’s pretty funny. I do not know why she is so concerned with everyone’s future but she seems to need to know that everyone has a plan. It did prompt me to ask Daniel on another day after explaining what it meant to grow up and get a job. I asked “Daniel what are you going to do when you grow up?” He said “Math, I am doing math.” I said “Hey, that’s a good idea you can do math. Do you know what you will do with math?” (Knowing that it was too broad of a question, so he may not respond.) Daniel:”I do math, with my fans and batteries.” I am not sure what that means, it does makes sense but I am not sure exactly what he is thinking. The point is he has a plan that satisfied Ariel and now all of her future plans for her and the rest of us are set. She seems to need that to keep her mind at peace, but she does go in a loop and will start telling me about all of her plans and then ask everyone else about theirs.

I do believe she will go into some sort of career with animals.

She loves animals as much as I do, if I would have been encouraged I may have gone into a field with animals as well. Her animal interest does get a little creepy at times when she becomes the animals, stops talking and will contort her body in strange ways. She requests that we guess what she is and then learn her animal language, I do not recall doing that but I do feel deep connections with animals and I have been known to be quite obsessive about them. She isn’t really creepy, well when she acts like a certain dinosaur, that one is a bit creepy. Although, I do not discourage her, David and I both think that it’s great that when she learns something she acts it all out and any new information she gains about animals she HAS to reenact. It’s how she learns.

I am very happy about the fact that she has a plan to achieve her goals.

I think that it is really awesome how she feels confident in what she wants to do and sees no reason to feel like she cannot achieve whatever she puts her mind to. As a parent and after sharing  some my fears recently, I feel that it would be a great thing to help all of our kids to stay confident in who they are and accept themselves fully, along with accepting others for who they are as well. I think she is on her way to being a very self-confident girl and hopefully she can find someone, if she even wants to by then, who will respect that and encourage it, just like her Daddy. :-)

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