David and I decided before we had children that we were going to home school. It was not because of religious reasons specifically, it played a small role in our decision. My experience in school was horrific. I was in a relatively small town that my mom and I did not fit in. I didn’t have teachers that cared about my academic growth. I had major stress in my life as a young child and all through my schooling. I didn’t get bad grades until junior high and then went down hill. Between the social dynamics that caused me much anxiety and my home life I gave up.

Why home school?

Everyone has to make their own choice about homeschooling. Personally I feel there are many people who should not be homeschooling. But I won’t go into that. We have done a lot of research and found a lot of different ways to help me to teach them and for them to learn. I by no means have it down. They are preschool age so this is my time to go with the flow of their learning but also focus on helping Daniel gain the skills he needs to do well with academics, actually Ariel and Joshua as well. I am using this for social as well. Daniel is learning social ques with Ariel and Joshua.

A good article:

http://www.associatedcontent.comarticle198399homeschooling_a_child_with_aspergers.html?cat=4

David has been teaching home school kids for almost four years. He is a chemist but teaches middle school age in different sciences. He has also taught at college level in different science arenas as well.  He has a passion to get people interested in science and math. Especially kids because when they begin to see how awesome science is they get excited about learning the different aspects of science.  How it plays a huge role in their life and they never realized it. It’s all about helping people become critical thinkers.

We are very visual.

I have to think of creative ways to make our lessons come alive.  I try to incorporate many different aspects to help us stay interested. I come up with themes each month. I use several different websites to give me ideas and pick and choose what to do.

I will pick the theme (this helps me to stay organized because I have a very hard time with that). I then order books from the library on the theme, I get DVD’s from Netflix or the library, or our personal collection about the theme. I find activities, such as games and manipulatives. Like creating stories ourselves, using puppets or our plastic people/animals about the theme.

I make word walls with the main vocabulary we are learning. Practice writing sheets with the letters of those words. CD’s with songs about the themes, if we do not have the cd’s there is always Youtube or http://www.totlol.com/. We always have our trusty “let’s make up our own song about this”. I find crafts to go along with the theme.

It doesn’t always work.

It is ok if we miss a few days. It is ok if we don’t do it all. It is ok if they are not in the mood. I have to tell myself that other wise I get really stressed out and feel like I have not accomplished anything. They need to have fun and enjoy themselves. So do I. If it is not fun while we learn then it is pointless and everyone is stressed. So on the days that it doesn’t go as planned, which is quite often, I really just go with the flow.

Some days are better than others.

I use many different links to put together our curriculum. I have listed several below. This is not exhaustive but it is a good place to start. I don’t use all of them all the time – I like having many varieties to choose from. I add Bible teachings to their lessons also but right now the most important thing for them is to know that God loves them and we love them for who they are and encourage them to be themselves. Learning and having fun is part of who they are not forcing them to learn.

That is my opinion for our family.

Everyone has to find their own way and create the learning environment best for them. A lot of these things are just fun ways to have kids get the skills they need. It doesn’t have to be about “homeschooling”. These links can be used for family nights, weekend fun, getting dad or other family members involved, whatever. It doesn’t have to be structured and rigid it doesn’t have to be like a classroom. These are great links for sensory issues also. I do a theme to help me stay focused.

My advice is to find what works for you.

I encourage you to just keep doing it and doing it. I have to change things around a lot and go with the flow of our family dynamics. Having three very different children doesn’t  allow for the same way everyday. It is not always easy but it is worth it.

Here are several links I use:

Online Stories/Learn to read

Pre-school Library

Learn To Read Free

Crafts/Activities/Worksheets

Preschool Rock

The Best Kids Book Site

Free Worksheets

Artists Helping Children

AtoZ Kids Stuff Recipes

Themes/Lessons

DLTK’s Teaching

Everything Preschool

PBSKids/read

Letter of the Week

Preschool Themes and Lessons

This one has some really good articles about homeschooling and other sites.

BestHomeschooling.org

Not one teacher took interest in me.

Not one teacher gave me encouragement all through grade school, all through junior high, by the time I got to high school I felt like a failure. I skipped school constantly. I had meltdowns in class, once I threw a desk across the room. Another time a teacher yelled at me for talking when I wasn’t talking and I stormed out to the vice principles office. The teacher followed me needless to say I had a meltdowns in his office full blown hyperventilation and screaming. I couldn’t help myself.

I was expelled the last week of junior high and I got expelled my freshmen year for skipping two weeks of school. I tried to straighten up I really did. I tried to do my classwork. I tried to stay awake in class. But the lights, the noise, my peers, the hallway, my locker, everything would close in on me and I couldn’t focus. I would skip class and stay in the bathroom stall waiting just waiting for the day to be over.

They just thought I was rebellious.

I wanted so much to succeed but I couldn’t. I did have one teacher who gave me positive feedback. She was my English teacher, she said she wanted to see me in Advanced Literature the next year. She said I could write. But that positive was quickly erased with all of the negative I had from other teachers. I was told I was lazy, waste of time, wouldn’t achieve anything. I had no value because I wasn’t doing the work and not fitting in. I wasn’t in sports or academic activities so I had nothing to offer.

I had no value.

So they thought. The truth is they failed me. No one recognized that I had potential and if they did they didn’t have the time or resources to deal with me. How could they? They had 20 other kids to teach plus five other classes. It is no ones fault. The academic system doesn’t work for kids with AS unless they have the time, money, resources, and the right teachers. Or parents who will fight for their AS kids. My mom had no idea. She struggled all through school and just told me to get it over with, like her.

Other school areas may be different.

However, where we live it is the best for us as a family to home school. We do not want our children to go through this kind of hurt and have feelings of being a  failure. Public school failed me because it told me I wasn’t worth anything. When I tried to express what was going on I was dismissed and labeled a delinquent. The thing is I tried. I wanted someone to help me. For goodness sakes I dressed in all black, I wrote poetry and essays about death. I had meltdowns and skipped school. I suffered from suicidal thoughts. I tried to commit suicide and ended up in the emergency room. My mom didn’t think to share this with my school. Why would she, they had been unsympathetic in the past.

No one cared enough to ask what was wrong and no one had the time to recognize I was hurting. No one called my mom about my school issues and she had no idea until recently when I told her what was going on. She was a single mother who had to provide for three children. I was a teenager and my sisters were toddlers. She worked over 50 hours a week. I couldn’t talk to her, I couldn’t talk to anyone.

I was left on my own to figure it out and all I could say was “I guess they are right”.

So I am going over things in my mind and thinking of the last church we were at. As I have been writing my feelings down I am reminded of the other people who were loving and compassionate in various ways. It is very hard to remember those people when the unloving few are the loudest and seem to be running the show. I use the words “feelings” and “seem” to indicate that is what I felt whether it be true or not the fact is I felt it and it seemed to be the case.

Not all are bad.

By the end of our journey at the last church I was serious about not going back to church.  To tell you the truth I am so tired of people claiming freedom but continue to be hateful or mean or completely ignorant of what they are talking about. We have been in many “charismatic” churches over the past few years. I have only been in one where they had a balance of reason and spirituality. That church encouraged you to think for yourself, challenge your beliefs, and love people where they are at.

The churches in charismatic circles “seem” to want you to think passively and follow the leader no matter what.

It’s unfortunate that I am having to work through things about people and I can’t just get over it. I get really angry when there are people in leadership who are not held accountable and who dictate to their people what to think. You are not encouraged to think for yourself. When I read the Bible I don’t see God telling us to be sheep, He is actually encouraging us NOT to be sheep. So in churches where I am made to feel that way I have to leave.

I am working through my emotions and dealing with how people treated us. I guess I feel the need to write this out for myself to remember that it is ok to say someone is treating me badly and I don’t have to take it. Even if it is an unspoken form of manipulation. Those are the worse because they are so hard to pin point but I I feel like I have some understanding of how bullies operate now after all of these years.  My AS has made it very difficult to recognize when people are being mean. However, through reading about other people with the similar issues, now I have a strategy. I can just leave not say a word and just brush it off. Sometimes easier said than done.

Who cares what other people think.

Really what does it matter if those people talk bad about you, gossip, or don’t understand you. Just by doing that they are proving they don’t know you at all and they don’t care to. Why waste time on people who don’t value who you are and what you have to offer.

Shake off the dust, the words of Jesus.

This applies to all people who do not value me not just church people. But as I shake off the dust I must remember not to say all people in their circles are like that. They are not. I have met some really great people in the midst and they care for me and my family. I value them and I thank God that He doesn’t make it so easy for me to think in black and white when it comes to people. If I did I would be just like those I am talking about, not seeing the wheat in the midst of the weeds. (good with the bad)

Is that wrong?

Ok, they are not weeds they are just people who are either unwilling to change, not aware of how bad they are, they are incredibly hurt and insecure or all of the above. I have to say I can fit into all those as well so maybe I need to try to be a bit more forgiving.

But I don’t have to keep them in  my life, I can just quietly leave.

We have found a church that is very loving. They are  loving toward our children. They are concerned and willing to do whatever they can to help Daniel succeed. Actually all of our children.  Several of the teachers have gone to school for child development, psychology, and early childhood education so they understand the needs that Daniel has. They have gone out of their way to help and they haven’t given us the token “we’ll pray for him to be healed”. Isn’t that quite the cop out in some ways. Very easy to say those words and not do anything.

So my hope is being restored in people and I won’t throw them all out if there is one bad seed.

Well I am coming down from the adventure of going to watch a movie for the first time as a family. Thanks to the Autism Society of America we were able to go see the movie “UP”. They are providing sensory sensitive theatre once a month. Here is the link to check it out:

http://www.autism-society.org/site/PageServer?pagename=sensoryfilms

This was our first time and we were not sure what to expect. Being sensitive to those with specials needs includes no advertisements, they go directly to the film. Also “lights brought up and the sound turned down, families will be able to bring in their own gluten-free, casein-free snacks”. We were told if we needed to have quiet there was a theater for us where there were no movies playing around it so it was indeed quiet. There is no discouragement in being loud or speaking. And we were told we could move around if we needed to.

All of this was truly freeing. However, I must say I was overwhelmed with emotion and spent the first few minutes crying. I usually do not do that. The whole thing was quite stressful from start to finish but it was a great thing and we are going to attempt it again next month. We don’t know how Daniel will respond next time since he knows what to expect now.

All of the kids did very well.

Daniel made it through until the last 30 minutes, which is a miracle in itself. I explained to him what we were going to do before we went in and tried to ease all of us into this as gently as possibly.

We sat down and the movie started. Daniel, Ariel, and Joshua all watched with an excitement and a curiousness. I was watching it and getting sick. There was too much motion, spinning, colors, loud noises, the other children in the theater humming, talking, shouting, doing what they needed to do to help themselves. I tried very hard not to get up and start freaking out. I HAD to be ok for the kids.

It was too much though.

I was hit with the emotion of this being the first time that we have been able to see a movie together. I had joy for my kids, excitement because they got to experience something new, stress because I didn’t know how any of them were going to respond, especially Daniel. He could have started screaming and hitting at any second. The emotions from the movie itself. The first 10 minutes is very funny, happy, sad, and kind of despairing. But it was a good movie, what I saw of it anyway. Being it is our anniversary this Sunday it kind of choked me up because just having that intense moment of possibly loosing the love of my life and what would happen if he goes first.

I don’t want to think about that.

The noise was still very loud to me. I don’t know how loud it is in a normal theater we haven’t been in almost six years. I could barely take it and it was suppose to be softer. The lighting was much better though. So the noise from the movie and the noise from the children in the theater really made me nauseous. If you have not heard an autistic child or special needs in some way scream, shout or make a noise that is indescribable, there is no way to relate it – you have to hear it to know. I was hit with the emotion of all of all of the parents in that room with us who understand. They understand and we understand them. Not many people do unless they experience it. Having that sense of someone understanding our pain and joy was overwhelming for me.

My heart trumped my own sensory issues and I thanked God for my Daniel.

This may sound horrible but it is what I was feeling. I thanked God for Daniel’s issues. What I heard made me feel for the mothers and fathers who have the strength to help their child. We are blessed that Daniel has high functioning autism and the majority of his issues can possibly be outgrown as he gets older with work and therapy. Autism is much more complicated in certain ways that I can’t imagine. But for a moment I felt their pain. But I also felt their joy because in the midst of all of the noise and movie action there were voices singing loudly intangible but beautiful. One boy kept shouting out comments to the movie talking to the characters and it was awesome. At one point he turned around and I just smiled at him and he smiled back a huge grin and waved. I waved back and thought, what a gift.

I got to share a moment that most people never get to encounter.

A moment of being in the midst of some of the most loving, free, enjoyable children that the world cuts off. They are so special and we can learn so much from them. I learn so much from my children. Daniel has taught me to never give up and to not care what other people think. Thanks to him I have overcome a lot of social anxiety, fears, and phobias. He made me aware of what those were in my life and I am taking the steps to be free from those so I can help our children not suffer from any of them. My job is to instill in them how to be a critical thinker, enjoy life, be confident in who they are, and learn how to use their gifts to their full potential.

Daniel had to leave the theater.

However, he did leave the last five minutes and he chose to do so himself. That was awesome. As we were walking around the hallways, I was once again getting nauseous. I now know why we don’t go to the movies. All of the lights flickering, the music blaring, the sounds thundering, the carpet full of dizzying designs, the posters everywhere, people walking all around, the video games flashing and making noise, the concession area full of flashing advertisements, words tickering across the register screen and all the vibrant colors on the candy packages.

It is a sensory-sensitive person’s nightmare.

So now I am exhausted. I am drained and tired. I feel like I have been up for nights and my head is spinning. But – and I say BUT – this is a glorious day. Daniel is in the other room playing on the computer a phonics game and has not had a meltdown. HE is happy and talking even though he is completely overloaded. The meltdown may come and I am prepared for it but he sat in a movie theater watching a movie for an hour and a half. I cannot get him to watch a movie at home longer than 30 minutes usually. We do have rare occasions but this was a place filled with noise, different lights, and visual stimulation. Ariel and Joshua got to enjoy the experience and we didn’t have to leave. They are having some issues right now but over all they are doing very well also (brother and sister tiffs over toys). Both having a little overload meltdowns but not too bad.

I say this is a very incredible day!

Ok, so let’s talk about special interests. Daniel’s happens to be anything that spins. He loves fans, ceiling fans, and helicopters. Those happen to be his favorite but he can make anything spin. He finds games on the computer that has games that spin. He will look for fans in the store. He points them out wherever we go. I have to keep him close because when it comes to fans or something he thinks spins he will go after it. He has gotten much better at holding my hand and pulling me but still I have to stay cautious.

I use his special interest to help him learn.

I got so frustrated trying to teach him and teach him in the school setting like I was taught. I don’t know why I tried to teach him that way when I had such a hard time in school. I didn’t learn that way why would he? So I decided to start with helping him learn how to color. I found all the helicopter coloring pages I could and made him his own coloring books. I made fan coloring books as well. So when Ariel and Joshua would sit and color I would take Daniel’s coloring books and sit it with them and say “look Daniel here are your coloring books, just like Ariel and Joshua come color”. He started coming over and trying to color. It worked. Now he will color the pages I have for our theme and different pictures.

Counting spinning things.

I use his special interests to teach him to spell. His first word to spell was F-A-N. Fan of course. I used it to count. I will have him count helicopters, fans, ceiling fan blades, and we look for shapes as well as colors with his special interest. This has opened a huge door for his learning. He is now counting all the time. He does find shapes everywhere like at the park he finds hexagons above the slide and recognizes that the slide is a rectangle. I have used the helicopter and fan to help him construct sentences like “There is the helicopter in the sky” “Look at the helicopter”. He now uses those sentences when we see a helicopter flying. Also ” Look at the ceiling fan spin”. He says that often.

Use the special interest if you can.

As long as it is not damaging or harmful if you can use their special interest do so and try to act like you love it as much as them. I find ceiling fans quite boring and I do have vertigo so anything that spins can really make me nauseous but I do my best and stay interested with him so he will be interested with me. It has worked for us. I always want to emphasize that we should do what works for our own family and that takes a lot of trial and error. I am open to other suggestions too. Whatever I can do to help my child enhance his skills and better his life I will try, as long as it is not dangerous or harmful.

I mainly use the Clifford Phonics and Disney Art Studio with these right now. I have used the I Spy with Daniel as well and when he is on it is a great learning tool. Ariel and Joshua love all of the games. Ariel has learned how to type from one of the games as well.

These were in an activity book I purchased. I cut them out and used clear contact paper to cover them. They have colors, clothes, objects, and other words with pictures. Since Daniel thinks in pictures they really helped his vocabulary.

I use all of these flash cards for all of the kids. I usually use these on days when Daniel is speaking a lot and able to focus. I also will pull them out when he is focused on his special interest and ask him what the pictures are and what they begin with. He will most times tell and laugh. He thinks it is pretty cool when I spin with him and use the cards.

I use these on days when I notice that Daniel’s fine motor skills seem to be working well. Sometimes he cannot use his fingers very well so when I have tried these activities on those days it has caused him and myself much frustration. I want him to succeed so I observe everyday and watch for what he is able to do that day.

Here is our sand box. There was a day when Daniel would not touch sand those days are gone. But some days at the beach we get hand fulls of sand in our hair thanks to Daniel throwing it up in the air.

A must have for any child with sensory issues and autism spectrum. Deep pressure in put.

I use these like flash cards and ask Daniel what it is. They are good because they have felt on them and they are made of wood. These really help him connect the word with the image. Very good for tactile.

Light Brite always good for fine motor and as we are doing it I try to come up with a story to go with the picture. I also ask him different things about the picture like what shapes do you see? What colors are we using?

Beans, I put objects in the beans and ask him to sort colors or shapes. I have one like this with rice too.

The Word Wammer. He likes this because of the colors that light up and the music. It has been a great way to teach him words.

These are only a few things that I use. Finger paints, foam, shaving cream, food like cottage cheese, or yogurt are used to create art. I have to try anything to help him. Using the the cottage cheese actually helped him learn how to feed himself. He was three before he was able to do that. He figured it out by me slapping a pile of cottage cheese on the table and mashing his hands in it. Then I stuck his finger in his mouth. He almost had a meltdown but then something clicked and he started shoving it in his mouth. So I gave him a spoon and he began feeding himself. Try anything you can to help your child. Get creative get crazy and don’t limit yourself to one way. Try, try, try, and try. When you feel like giving up try one more time it just may be the day that they do it!

Another great thing are baths. When he is having a hard time getting back into a focused state of mind I suggest a bath. He loves it and it helps calm him down. Everyday is different. It takes a lot of observation and I don’t stop. Therapy is ongoing all day long whenever I see an opportunity I take it. I don’t push him if he truly has had enough. I get tired and weary and sometimes I crash but then I get up and go at it again. It’s ok to crash and it’s ok to take a break. Everyone needs to find their outlet. I love to workout, write, read, and yes veg on Facebook. I find it very relaxing to see what people are up to and look at pictures.

Listening

I don’t understand! I don’t know what you are saying to me. Why are you so upset? I am only speaking the truth. Doesn’t everyone want to know the truth? Seriously? You don’t want me to tell you the truth? Well then I am going to have to stop talking. If I can’t say the truth, I can’t say anything. I have to say I may explode though, or leave one of the two. I don’t know how to live like that.

One sided conversation? You think this is a one sided conversation? What do you mean? It’s one sided because you are doing all of the talking and I am listening? Is that what you mean? You just told me not to tell you the truth, right? So I am just listening. OH, MY GOD! I don’t understand what you are talking about.

Hearing

Right now your voice sounds like a screeching owl and it is causing my brain to feel like it’s going to expand like a wet sponge and ooze out of my head. Can you please talk softer? Now what did I do? I just told you what it feels like for me when you talk in that voice. Oh, is that telling the truth when I shouldn’t? Why are you yelling at me?

Seeing

Do you have to wear that red shirt it is causing my eyes to strain and feel like they are going to melt? What color of red is that anyway? Oh, that made you angry? What I just said? Well I just think if we are going to have a discussion like this it would be nice if you wore another shirt that is more appealing. That way I can look at you and not feel like I am having blurred vision. Right? I could just close my eyes but it wouldn’t much help since I can still see your red shirt in my mind.

Smelling

Thank you for changing your shirt. Ok, so what you were saying is “the problem is me”? You said “I don’t communicate well or show emotion”? Is that right? Let’s see…”I have anger issues and I am too isolated”. Do you smell that? Um….”I need to be more social, I don’t have any friends”. I smell something! It is a very strong scent. Ok, ok you don’t understand me. “I am obsessed”. Ok, that’s it! That smell is driving me crazy! It smells like flowers or fruit or something. (Sniff, sniff) It’s your shirt! Oh, my take that off. Are you using a new detergent? Is that cologne or something? Oh, get it off; you have to wear something else. That smell is burning my nostrils! It’s just awful. Hey, where are you going? I thought we were having a discussion. We’re done? Oh, good, I am hungry. Ok, call me later. I am glad we are finished. I could hardly go on, I am so hungry.

Taste
This is the best strawberries and yogurt ever! The seeds in the strawberries crunch in every bite. Oh, I don’t like it when the little seeds get into the groove of my teeth and I can’t get it out. I can’t do anything until I get that out. Ok, squish I love the squish in every bite. The strawberries are cold and squishy. I like saying the word “squishy”. I can feel the red color in my mouth. Funny, it’s ok to eat red I just can’t look at it. At least not that shade of red. That was very strange shade of red. This yogurt is so white; I love the fresh, soothing coolness. The white and red go so well together they are perfect. This is making my mouth so happy. The bitter and the sweet mixed together cause my tongue to leap for joy. Ah, now that is much better. Full belly, favorite chair, writing my thoughts. Nice, quiet, peaceful. I wonder when they will call. I think it went well.

From the beginning of Daniel’s therapy I was very frustrated and discouraged. All of the items that I was told he needed were outrageous in price and virtually impossible to get unless you went through online specialty stores. I would tell David “Daniel needs this” ” We have to get that”. The more I went through the catalogs and all over the websites the more I got frustrated and felt like a failure not helping my son. I started going to sensory diet websites and looking in my local stores for similar items.

That was the start of a great new adventure.

For things like a sand box, which we cannot afford, we found a storage box with a lid and bought play sand. We purchased storage boxes and filled one with rice and one with beans. I started thinking of ways to help Daniel with his motor skills and we found items like shapes that you can thread for a couple dollars. For his language we have collected a ton of flash cards that have been at Target for a $1.00 or Wal-Mart running about $2-3 dollars. We found a box set of computer learning games at Sam’s a few years ago and Daniel loves playing the Clifford phonics and Disney drawing. This has helped him with his coloring on actual paper and trying to draw pictures. Our biggest purchase has been a trampoline since our couch is getting destroyed and the beds don’t work from all of his jumping on them.

He mainly draws circles.

I am homeschooling the kids and using all of my everyday homeschooling items to do Daniel’s therapy. There are times when I feel like none of this is working or that I am not doing enough to help him learn the skills he needs. But then yesterday after weeks of not talking very much and then only whispering, he begins spelling words for me. He starts playing with Ariel and Joshua and interacting with them.

Some great things have happened this last week.

We got the movie WALL-E and David had a feeling Daniel would really connect with the movie so he got a WALL-E book as well. Daniel did, he has just recently started watching movies with us. In the past he would come in and out of the room. Maybe look at the show for a few minutes and then run off. In the past few months he has started watching shows like Toy Story and Nemo. However he has never grabbed the book and had me read it to him. He has been doing that this whole week. He loves the story. He has only brought me a Clifford book and his Fan book that I made him never a book that is connected to the movie he is watching.

I am sometimes afraid that he is going to loose what he has learned.

When he stops talking or won’t do any of the activities I plan for the week I think he may have lost the information he had. I am always wrong, after he gets over that hump I realize he has gained more skills and knowledge. He just doesn’t communicate it by talking. He doesn’t do all of the activities all the time but he CAN do them. He does them when HE feels up to it. So I am learning do not give up.

I have the visuals all around the house.

The themes I am doing for the month I keep on the wall in our living room. I have their crafts, pictures, and paintings all on our kitchen wall. I have the calendar for the month in plain view. I have made our home into a learning center all over. Their rooms are clear and uncluttered. But I have all of this visual for all of us so we do not forget what we are learning and so we can talk about it. That doesn’t work for some people but for us it is what works. It was hard to get used to at first because I like my walls white and uncluttered. Very simple in decoration and all hanging things symmetric throughout the house. So I try to keep it as clean as possible. The children learning has trumped my issues. Sometimes I clear it all out when I am feeling overwhelmed I am sure Daniel does too but then I give us several days and it is all good again.

My AS makes it very difficult to keep organized and focused.

So I do everything I can to help me and the kids stay excited and focused on what we are learning. You have to do what works for your family. David wants to be very much involved in their learning so doing this helps him to know what we are learning and including him to be an active participant. Instead of me filling him in on what we did for the day he gets to see and asks questions or come up with other ideas to do with the kids that they can do with “Dad”.

Everyone gets excited and talks about what is on the wall during dinner or after dinner sharing the words they spelled for the day. I have noticed by doing this Daniel is starting to want to participate as well. When he sees and hears us talking about the crafts or something he will go over to them and look at them or point to his own, then Ariel’s and Joshua’s. So any effort like this helps him feel connected to us and us to him.

It is SO worth it.

I plan on including some pictures of items I use in a later post it is not exhaustive but they have been great helps. I take my cues from Daniel when he is in the mood to learn that is when I keep going until I can tell he is over it. When he doesn’t feel like it I make it a day of sensory fun. Jumping, sand, beans, Play Dough, whatever I can get him to do. He loves the computer which has helped him in a lot of ways with communication. Some of the links I use are:

http://www.zacbrowser.com/

http://pbskids.org/

http://www.kidzui.com/

Daniel is a remarkable child. He is so loving and kind it really throws me for a loop when he has a meltdown. Especially when he has made huge progress then all of the sudden BAM! The weather plays a big role in his sensory issues, so does the moon cycle, and pollen. All of these things mess me up too so I do not understand why I become so surprised when he is having a hard time. For some reason I just can’t get it in my head. So I try to help him as best as I can.

He is whispering.

We have had some severe rain weather the last two weeks and Daniel stopped talking. He really wouldn’t talk for days so I didn’t know what he wanted and he started having meltdowns. The last few days I have noticed that he is whispering a lot more words than he had been using before. I think he is practicing and building his confidence. Actually I am quite exhausted from trying to figure out what he wants all day long plus trying to get him to eat and Ariel and Joshua not being themselves as well.

So I begin to give up.

But just when I get to the point of thinking nothing is going to change. Daniel surprises me. He is spelling words on his Clifford game, he was matching pictures and playing memory. He made pictures of a snowman with glue and a cloud picture with glue. He laced a square with shoe string and he traced an S with paint in the last two days. Last week he wouldn’t even sit for five minutes to draw a picture.

So what do I say?

I say I love how all of my children challenge me not to give up, EVER! I love how Daniel surprises me all the time. Sometimes I feel very tired and weak and say why can’t we just be normal. Then I get over myself and become very grateful that Daniel has brought such healing to me. I am so thankful that our family is not normal and the challenges we face cause me to beat my beliefs against the rock until I can call them own. Ariel and Joshua challenge me as well . They have AS traits also but theirs are different and definitely not as extreme.

We are blessed to be different.